Santa and Banta Jokes

1. An englishman asked Santa, "How far is land"?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
Santa: Downwards

2. How did santa tried to kill a bird??
He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.

3. Santa: I have swallowed a key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

4. Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the
line said: I've seen ur password. It’s ****.
Santa: U r wrong. It’s 1394.

5. Santa falls in love with a nurse...
After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter
to her: "I luv u sister."

6. Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?
Banta: Very simple, because he is PM not AM.

7. Pappu while filling up a form: What should I write against mother tongue.?
Santa: Very long...!

8. lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press
the bell but no one comes out.

9. Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he
hasn't came back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else?

10. An englishman and santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!

11. Why did santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.

12. Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home. The stearing, dash board,
gears of car have been stolen.
After sometime he calls again: I am coming, earlier I sat on the back seat

13. History teacher asked Santa: Name kalidas's brother who was a shoemaker.
Santa: Adidas